Changing your last name after marriage is a deeply personal decision that many people grapple with. Traditionally, it has been the norm for women to adopt their husband’s last name upon marriage. However, as societal norms evolve, more men are considering the option of taking their wife’s last name.
While the process might seem straightforward, it involves several legal steps and potential challenges, depending on where you live. In this article, we’ll guide you through the process, covering everything from your options to the legalities, and what you need to do once you’ve made the change.
What are Your Options?
Before diving into the process, it’s essential to understand your options. Taking your wife’s last name is just one of several possibilities available to couples when deciding on a post-marriage surname. Here are a few common choices:
- Keeping Your Own Last Name: This is the simplest option, requiring no legal changes or administrative work. Both partners keep the names they were born with.
- Taking Your Wife’s Last Name: This is less common but increasingly considered. It involves legally changing your surname to match your wife’s.
- Hyphenating Both Names: Some couples choose to hyphenate their last names, creating a combined name that represents both individuals equally.
- Creating a New Last Name: Some couples decide to blend their last names or create an entirely new name that has significance for both.
- Double-Barrelled Name: Similar to hyphenation, this involves using both last names without a hyphen, which can sometimes be more convenient depending on legal documents and preferences.
Once you’ve made your decision, the next step is understanding the legal requirements for changing your name.
Legal Considerations for Last Name Change
While it may seem simple in theory, the process of taking your wife’s last name can be more complicated than it is for women taking their husband’s last name. This is largely due to the way laws are structured in various states and countries.
Marriage Certificate Name Change
For women in the United States, changing a last name after marriage is typically straightforward. All states allow a woman to change her last name to her husband’s using just a marriage certificate. However, when it comes to men taking their wife’s last name, the rules are not as accommodating.
In 17 states, men can also use a marriage certificate to change their last name, just like women. These states include:
- California
- Colorado
- Georgia
- Hawaii
- Iowa
- Kansas
- Louisiana
- Maryland
- Massachusetts
- Minnesota
- Nevada
- New Hampshire
- New York
- North Dakota
- Oklahoma
- Oregon
- South Dakota
If you live in one of these states, you can proceed with your name change by obtaining a certified copy of your marriage certificate and presenting it to various institutions to update your name.
Court-Ordered Name Change
In the remaining states and the District of Columbia, men are required to obtain a court order to change their last name to their wife’s. This involves filing a petition with the court and sometimes publishing a notice of your intent to change your name in a local newspaper. The process can be time-consuming and may incur additional costs, which can range from $20 to over $400, depending on the state.
The court may require you to provide a reason for your name change, such as marriage. You may also need to demonstrate that you are not attempting to evade debts or legal obligations by changing your name. Once the court approves your petition, you’ll receive a court order, which you can then use to update your name with various agencies and institutions.
What are the Steps to Change Your Name?
Whether you’re using a marriage certificate or a court order, the steps to change your name are similar once you have the necessary legal documentation.
Obtain Your Marriage Certificate or Court Order
If you’re in a state where a marriage certificate suffices, get a certified copy of it. If you need a court order, complete the court petition process and obtain the necessary documents.
Update Your Social Security Card
Your first stop should be the Social Security Administration (SSA). You’ll need to fill out the application for a Social Security card (Form SS-5), provide your marriage certificate or court order, and show proof of identity. There’s no fee to update your Social Security card.
Visit the DMV
Next, update your driver’s license or state ID. The requirements vary by state, but you’ll typically need to bring your current driver’s license, your marriage certificate or court order, and proof of your Social Security number.
Update Your Passport
If you have a passport, you’ll need to update it to reflect your new name. You’ll need to submit Form DS-5504, DS-82, or DS-11, depending on when your passport was issued and how long you’ve had it. You’ll also need to provide your marriage certificate or court order and a recent passport photo.
Notify Your Employer
It’s essential to update your employer to ensure that your tax documents and payroll reflect your new name. Provide a copy of your updated Social Security card or another form of identification.
Update Financial Institutions
Notify your bank, credit card companies, and any other financial institutions of your name change. Most institutions will require you to provide a marriage certificate or court order.
Update Your Insurance Providers
If you have health, auto, or other types of insurance, contact your providers to update your policies with your new name.
Notify Other Relevant Institutions
This includes your utility companies, voter registration, mortgage company, and any other organization where you have an account or official dealings. Don’t forget to update your email address and any subscriptions or memberships you may have.
Update Your Will and Legal Documents
If you have a will, power of attorney, or other legal documents, you’ll need to update them to reflect your new name.
Consider Updating Your Professional Licenses
If you hold any professional licenses (e.g., medical, legal, or real estate), be sure to update them with the relevant licensing boards.
Potential Challenges and Considerations
Changing your last name can come with challenges beyond the legal requirements. Here are a few things to keep in mind:
- Social and Cultural Expectations: While more men are choosing to take their wife’s last name, it’s still relatively uncommon. Be prepared for questions or assumptions from others who may not be familiar with this choice.
- Professional Impact: If you have built a career under your original last name, consider how the change might affect your professional identity. You may choose to continue using your original name professionally while adopting your wife’s name legally.
- Emotional Impact: Name changes can have emotional implications, especially if your name holds significant personal or cultural meaning. It’s important to have an open and honest conversation with your partner about the decision.
- Children’s Last Names: If you plan to have children, consider how your name change might impact your decision about their last names.
Conclusion
Taking your wife’s last name is a personal decision that requires careful consideration and planning. While it may involve more legal steps than the traditional route, it is certainly possible and increasingly accepted. Understanding your options and the legal requirements in your state is the first step toward making the change. Once you’ve made the decision, follow the necessary steps to update your name with all relevant institutions. Remember, this change is about reflecting your partnership and personal values, so choose the path that feels right for you and your spouse.